Dear Editor,

 

 

Prior to January 2006 I would have fully agreed with these points.  I would also have supported the rights of parents to physically discipline their children, and would have used physical discipline on my children, just as my father had on me. 

 

I now believe in a complete prohibition on the use of physical discipline in the upbringing of children.  In rejecting violence as a form of punishment I in no way discount the positive and necessary concept of discipline in a child’s development.  I believe that balanced and healthy development of children relies on parents and other adults providing guidance and direction, in a non violent manner which is in line with children’s evolving capacities and necessary for their growth towards responsible life in a society of tolerance, peace and respect for human dignity and rights.

 

Two factors have been responsible for challenging my mindset and causing this reversal on physical discipline. Firstly, the voices of children and secondly informed discussion.  In this letter I respectfully seek to share both with Mr. Wilson and your readers. 

 

In January 2006 as part of postgraduate studies in law I researched the physical discipline of children in Tonga, both in schools and the home.  Physical discipline was defined as the use of ANY physical  force or power, threatened or actual, causing some degree of pain or discomfort, however light, in order to discipline, correct, control, change behaviour, or in the belief of educating/bringing up a child.

 

In addition to wide legal and literature reviews I also interviewed 100 children and 50 parents separately, voluntarily and anonymously in random places around Nuku’alofa.  I also interviewed 46 teachers in random primary and secondary schools in Tongatapu.

 

While I have over 100 pages of findings, I wish to briefly just address some pertinent points raised by Mr. Wilson’s letter.

 

 

 

Physical punishment DOES kill children. There are many documented cases of children dying at the hands of parents who were intending to just discipline with a smack.

 

In my study of court cases in Tonga, amongst other deaths of children at the hands of their parents, a 16 year old boy from Tongatapu was punished by his father for being drunk, in the same manner that he was punished on other occasions; the boy would be demanded to approach his father and there receive a strike with the hand, usually a fist. On this occasion the father punched the boy twice in the middle of the chest. The boy lost consciousness and was taken to hospital but could not be revived.

 

It is also important to look at the bigger picture too.

 

 

 

Analysis of records from the Tongan Ministry of Police highlights that an overwhelming majority of suicide victims in Tonga between 1991 and 2005 have been children.  This rate is almost 4.5 times higher than the international average for youth suicide.  Furthermore, of concern is that boys aged 5 to 14 years account for 16% of total suicide victims in Tonga, which is 22 times higher than the international average for this age group.

 

 

This is not theory Mr. Wilson, these are depressing facts.

 

 

 

 

I agree with Mr. Wilson that children with too much freedom and lack of discipline can become a social problem.  However, the form of discipline (not just the lack of) also has important ramifications on the occurrence of these social issues too.

 

 

Mr. Wilson’s claim that a lack of physical discipline causes, amongst other things, “…truancy and [children] leaving schools without qualifications” is in total contrast to the findings of my research in Tonga where the threat and occurrence of physical punishment in schools was reported by children to INCREASE truancy and drop out rates.  For example, 48% of children reported that they had missed one or more days of school during term 1, 2006 due to injuries sustained from physical punishment inflicted by teachers.  This figure was confirmed by 43% of parents who reported that their children had experienced the same.  59% of children reported that they had missed one or more days of school during term 1, 2006 because they were scared of being physically punished.

 

 

 

 

 

It is important for us to realise that the law is not just about sanctions but more importantly about education.  There are other alternatives to disciplining children, without having to resort to violence, we have to have the courage to step out of our comfort zone (ie: “this is how child discipline has always been done”) and explore these alternatives.  Remember that violence in society starts in the home. 

 

New Zealand has the opportunity to lead Australia and the Pacific by putting ideals for a peaceful, non-violent society into practice.  No one is saying that this will be easy… but surely it is worth the effort. 

 

TNEWS I look forward to you facilitating the continued dialogue of our children, families and politicians on this important issue.

 

Kind regards

 

Gus McLean